Veni. Vidi. No Vici.

I came.  I saw.  But I sure as heck didn't conquer....

OUR TOP 10 FREAKIEST FOODS OF THE WORLD!
Things we tried and didn't like, tried and couldn't successfully swallow, could have tried and decided against it or never want to see again because it scares us.

taking the Subway
2nd to the right: Durian!

1.  Durian: An Asian spiky hard fruit on the outside (a brother to Jack Fruit) with a pulpy white inside that grows on big trees and is considered a fine delicacy...and smells and tastes like dirty foot. It's forbidden in many places to take it on many forms of public transportation.  In Singapore, we talked ourselves into sampling a special local street vendor dish of Durian Ice cream wrapped in two slices of chocolate flavored wonder bread.  We spent the rest of the evening trying to get the taste out of our mouths buying coffee and cokes from mini marts and trying not to spit in the country which forbids spitting....yuck!  You can even smell it coming out of your pores the next day....ewwww....this is just from the ice cream!

Rodolfo's first and last Durian ice cream sandwich

2.  Fried bugs:  Popular in Asia as well, you can find larvae, caterpillars etc, fried to a crisp with chilies and spices at many outdoor festivals/special occasions.  We never did find the courage to try one.  I don't regret it.  I'm sure it tastes like chicken, but life is too short!

I couldn't find a fried bug pic
Here's a Thai monkey instead!
He likes to eat bugs!

3.  Raw shrimp:  When we were in Tokyo, our friend took us out for sushi which was a very special treat for us.  The only thing we couldn't find it in ourselves to finish on the gigantic wooden sushi boat in the certain of the table was the pinkish/whitish/transparent raw shrimps.  I took a bite thinking it was a normal shrimp and when I bit down expecting a firmness, I got slimed.  After a slight panic I unsuccessfully attempted to pull with my teeth to cut it in half, but it had a consistency similar to raw...hmm....what I imagine a jelly fish might be like to try and bite down on....it was either all of it, or none of it and I had to spit it out, not wanting to know what it would feel like sliding down my throat.

Center front of sushi boat of love - freaky shrimp!
They look so normal, don't they?!?

4.  Cow Brain:  I got the incredible opportunity to try grilled cow brain at a special meat barbecue restaurant (Argentinian style Parillada) in Santiago a few years ago.  You have the option of two platters; normal meat, or odds and ends...we got one of each.  Odds and ends included my first delicious taste of blood sausage, livers, kidneys and of course cow brain, which I chewed and could not successfully swallow due to the soft squishy texture and unusual flavor, which my mind has blocked the details of...eating brain just doesn't seem like a good idea to me...like cannibalism or something....not that there is anything wrong with it...eating animal brain that is, the more of the animal eaten, the better!  It just sort of seems wrong in my mind....weird.

5.  Silk Worm Poo Tea: In Louang Probang Laos, we took a tour of a local silk factory.  On the premises, they also had a lovely small french style cafe to sit and chill out at after your tour.  The menu included;  coffee, sandwiches and many varietes of tea including....silk worm poo tea.  Hey, you know it's local!  They take the poo from their on site silk worms while they're growing and make tea out of it, which the waiter guaranteed had the same effect as red bull.  We couldn't do it.  Silk farmers and locals also enjoy eating the worms themselves.... once they die cooked up over rice....it's supposed to be very healthy!

Towards the bottom snuck in between Mulberry Tea and Beal Fruit Tea....oh yeah!

Dinner in our hut in the village
Moments before Lao Lao time!

6.  Lao Lao is a local Laos village drink which is distilled from rice.  Kind of like whiskey.  When we spent a night in a small village near Louang Namtha Laos, the village elder came to sell our group a barrel full of Lao Lao and sat down to drink with us.  It would be pretty rude not to at least try it....  It tasted to me like a combination of ethanol and urine...I was potentially not far off as they continually added liquid of an unknown variety from a mysteriously non-labeled jug into a crate of floating debris...which included rice!  Our 18 year old Vietnamese tour guide proceeded to get toasted and spent the next entire day hung over with blood shot eyes crooning his favorites while floating down the river as we kayaked, killing our ears...can you die from drinking large amounts of ethanol and pee?

A typical northern Laos village

Spicy currys/salads to go for Thai locals
Not meant for the tourist pallette!

7.  "How spicy?"  You sometimes learn the hard way in Thailand, this is a question not to be taken lightly.  A "little spicy" will have your mouth on fire.  "Very spicy" will send you out the door screaming for mommy.  No spicy?  Bearable.

Thai menu's in English/menu's in general are few and far between
The very last option looked particularly enticing to us.

beef cheek with pap...mmmmm

8.  Cow cheek: In Soweto, South Africa, Rodolfo took a bike tour from Lebo's Soweto Backpackers (an awesome hostel trying to improve its community/raise awareness about Soweto for tourists), where they let you sample local cuisines along the way.  This for Rodolfo included cow cheek, which he told me should definitely be included on this list.  He didn't go into detail.  He took a picture of the back of the shack where they splayed the inedible remains of the rest of the cow....wow....

outside the beef cheek restaurant

9.  Pap/Nsima/Ugali/etc.  There are lots of names for this corn meal mash throughout Africa as it is a basic staple for a meal along with a small bowl of beef stew (in some places, beef flavored water with piece of bone) beans and steamed greens....pap is kind of like grits....nothing wrong with it, we just ate our life times supply and can't consume it any longer.  It has a way of filling your tummy up, but in an empty way, where you see yourself eating a lot, but it doesn't give you that full, satisfied feeling that you're looking for, like eating snow.

A quite delicious Ugali with greens, beans and meat stew in Tanzania
This was one of the best we had.  When it's cooked well, it can be delicious!

10.  Piure:  A Chilean seafood delicacy that grows inside of hard clay and local fisherman pull it out using a sharp knife.  A bright red mussel like crustacean with an extreme earthy iron flavor.....like laundry detergent.  You either love them or you hate them!  I personally jumped up from the table screaming bloody murder.

Later on, I tried piure smoked on a grill melted into a whole brick of soft cheese and it was exquisite!  So....perhaps when its strong flavor is matched with other flavors, it's easier to handle!

Sea urchin is the the tan colored material in the bowl.
I quite like it now in small portions!  The same goes for piure.

Another member of this slimy odd flavored Chilean seafood family is the sea urchin (those big spikey black balls), which ties with the piure in my book for weird and funky flavor.  You eat it here in Chile by the bowl full with condiments of chopped onion, lemon and chopped parsley.  I also tried this one for my first time here in Chile this past December and was not prepared for the slimy unusual texture, but I liked it!  At first the oozy mouthful feels a bit like a tongue or ?tongues?, but quickly disintegrates into a fine pulp with an extreme ocean flavor...you either love it or you hate it!